He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
i just found five singles in my underwear?! im suspicious but delighted none the less
my dad is drunk dialing our relatives who are stuck in a blizzard asking them to pick up sun tan lotion for him cause hes too drunk to drive to the store.
after the first blizzard, i went out and bought a thirty and put it in a cooler and hid it out in the backyard. now the second blizzard has deposited 2 feet of snow on top of said cooler. there is a shovel and treasure map over here waiting for you
Shaking her cervix like it's the hottest ticket around
it's like doing a sit-up... but, you're inside someone
so, does the "dick the size of your forearm" thing run in the family then?
We have to have sex while I'm dressed as a tiger. It's one of my life goals
I'm beer bonging chocolate fondue. That's how my Valentines Day is going.
Well according to all the calls, texts, and Facebook messages, I threw up on you guys last night.
He's pretending to be my boyfriend so that my family won't bother us when we sneak off to smoke weed
SOS... STANDING IN THE BAR NEXT TO MY BF AND THE GUY WHO I HOOKED UP WITH ON CHRISTMAS DAY..
I decided we werent gonna go for round 5 when he started trying to have a serious conversation about how blessed he is to have such a nice penis
He has a point, the man's penis is a legend.
OMG LOOK AT THAT PIECE OF MAN
I haven’t trained for this.
i told him the only way i'd fuck him was if he saved me during the zombie apocolypse and took me to a tastefully decorated yet impenetrable hideout.
Randomize
