That guy youre talking to looks like Brian from Family Guy.
Here's my recipe for happiness. Go get a pen. 1. smoke a bowl 2. put on explosions in the sky 3. take a bath. Do this for about 1 hour or until all your problems go away.
I just named my vagina "The Boneyard"
More like "Chia Pet"
If she wasn't my friend I'd think she was a huge slut
True. She actually gives a fuck. A quality looked down upon if she wants to be one of us
she kept calling me pablo. i just went with it.
He offered me a 30 pack if I don't bring her to the party. Am I a bad friend If I take his offer?
I just ran up four flights of stairs in heels, im getting an orgasm tonite.
I am ina trunk. Iam in a trunnnnnjkk. I hope its yours. Oh manomanomano. Thids better be your trunk
I'm in this weird masturbatory haze making onion rings. If you want to come over we can eat these suckers and play TF2.
Why don't we hang out more often?
Dear lord though. So much glitter. It's just a big gay explosion and all of my whore muscles hurt.
sooo the guy I beat last night in strip pong is the manager's husband at my new job...
I'll be home soonish I need 4th of July sex, it's the American thing to do.
He plays D&D and his dick should be carved out of marble. I think I'm in love.
So Saturday night after 10 drinks I guess he tried to have sex with me and in the middle of it I asked "can you tell I'm faking it!?" and then I sat up and threw up in my hand. That's a sex Win in my books
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