Sex should be hot, sweaty, messy, and a little painful. At no point should it involve tiny rocks
i refuse to live in a world where loud threesomes in your own apartment are referred to as "rude"
did you yell "are you not entertained?"
whos cum tastes better, a guy who drinks apple juice or cranberry juice?
You guys crashed sarahs vespa into a snowbank and its still there. not cool.
im drunk. people are steering their children away from me. whatever it is that you called for, I assure you that I don't care. have a good night
For the amount of money I just spent on my dogs toe, I could have fucked the entire B squad at a low end strip club.
Romney sounds like a middle school girl and that creepy ass smile makes me want to close my blinds
I legitimately thought I was gonna die getting finger banged to ja rule in the back of your car last night.
The guy at the bar repeatedly told us he was an off duty cop from out of town, that to normal people would be the time where you stop asking him to smoke a blunt with us
I will keep you posted and someday if we daydrink teach you how to do a footjob
Hey are you going to the pride parade? If so get me a shit ton of condoms
don't do it for the experience, do it for the story. now get your ass in that bedroom
Do you think there are two dudes living in an apartment somewhere that go to the store and call it Brocery shopping?
Oh god...probably.
Glass of stolen champagne in a to go cup = tastiest hangover cure ever
I never thought I could be this turned on by a man wearing racoon tails.
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