he's a bartender at a gay strip club. maybe he can work his magic. with getting u in, not gay magic.
just saw a girl come out of the tanning bed room on crutches, now thats determination
Dude, she knew her leg was on fire and she kept dancing. Bad-fucking-ass.
Apparently one comment in my womens studies class cockblocks yourself for an entire semester.
She posted on her FB that he moved out...It's like she wants me to fuck him.
I can't. I will literally throw up my liver
Why dont you be an ebola patient for halloween? You can totally throw up and itll be part of your costume.
No, I don't just love you because you have big boobs. I just wouldn't visit as often.
Bad breakup?
He posted a pic of me fully naked and smiling as he inserted a carrot into my vagina as my FB profile pic and then changed the PW, locking me out of my own account. So 500 of my closest friends, family, and coworkers now have that mental image of me on FB.
went out last night. woke up with a lisp.
who has a one night stand on Christmas ? But he's pretty attractive so thumbs up
It bothers me when I see my old fuck buddies starting families on Facebook.
Like I could never be a lawyer because I would just look like a porn star impersonation of a lawyer.
I'll start cleaning the house tonight darlin. So you don't have to fuck your two boytoys in the driveway the next two days.
Painted a stripper an elf costume. Her coworkers liked it. Now in a room full of naked strippers.
I just had a man tell me he was going to think about me when he was fucking his wife tonight. This is my proudest moment as a gay.
Randomize
