...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
You know that bakery that Sandra Bullock's sister owns?
The one in Montpelier?
yeah, well it doesn't exist anymore. VT's one fucking claim to fame closed.
I could write a book called "things that come out of my vagina"
Do you think this abandoned cigarette has herpes? cuz I'm tempted.
So I realized I was officially over him when I was getting a lap dance on the keg bus at 3am from his old boss and I was double fisting:)
They want me to get them some X for there wedding present. I'm on the way to get it now
a guy just walked up to us....drank the rest of my beer....and said sorry for my loss before walking away.
I don't know at which point last night turned terribly, terribly wrong, but it was somewhere around Motel 6, specifically the parking lot.
A nice make out session never hurt anyone. Plus he's a pilot, so he'll know the safety procedures for when the night crashes and burns.
We are a team. I lure them in with my tits, feed them enough alcohol to consider homosexuality, and hand them off to you.
You're the best wingman ever.
Using our apartments online floor/space planner to see how many beer pong tables we can fit. Dont think they had this in mind when they put this thing online.
Probably not lol but were fitting as many as possible
Jus saw ur date getting a bj in the mcdonalds parking lot...u want anything?
I woke up naked with a Jason mask on and a fat lip. What happened last night?
Do it!! We better have a duck by the time I get home.
How are they?
Amazing! These new boobs are going to break blouse buttons and wedding vows!
Randomize
