is it a bad sign that i now think of my run-ins with cops as "skill building seminars"?
um, yeah. i think it is.
white trash bash was a total success...cops shut it down twice and her hair stayed in rollers all night..she never broke character
Someone wrote Kyle's bitch on me too. I dont even know who Kyle is.
ttyl tear gas
Yeah everyone's alive and well besides the still terrifying threat of Ted's conception of a human being
I just spent 20 mins in the shower washing n rewashing my body to get rid of stripper. I even loofa'd my face.
Apparently when it was last call I jumped up on the bar and told everyone to get the fuck out, which was immediately followed by a round of applause from the bouncers/bartenders and my tab getting paid as well.
So right before she was about to give me head she tapped the tip and said "Is this thing on" I think I'm in love.
I found a playlist on my ipod with only one song on it: gold digger. confused, but not surprised.
Of the 4 nights I've gone downtown this week, I've been "piss in the parking lot" drunk 5 times
The fact that I bookended my summer with pregnancy scares doesn't upset me. The fact that he's a trombone major does...
When you sleep in the bathroom, you're no longer a guest.
He told me that he wants to fuck me only wearing a princess tiara...How could I possibly say no to that?
So I missed the eclipse because I was masturbating.
I seriously thought Satan had his hand up my asshole and was pulling out my soul. Never. Again.
Randomize
