Porn is love you can see.
Megan Fox is the only woman I would let pee on me.
I'm similar. She's the only woman I'd ask to pee on me.
Ok yeah you're right. I'd ASK Megan Fox to pee on me. I'd ALLOW Erin Andrews to pee on me if she asked.
had to check his id this morning to remember his name.... i was wayy off
No, don't worry. We're not going to get THAT arrested.
my mom just asked me what a queef is. she needs to stop watching south park
next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
Dude, dont worry about the lamb fetus in the fridge.
What?
Just dont open the beer drawer.
There's a mouse. In the house. By the cans. With some pans. Release the cat. To eat his hat. Sorry about the mess. Of my breakfest.
No but seriously, there's a fucking mouse in the house by the beer cans
which guy lost his keys in my bed this weekend?
T minus 20 hours until we forget our names, find some city cowboys, and g&t into the night.
A man in a black on black escalade pulled up next to me, and told me he was sent to pick me up by you.
His name is Tyreece. He will take you to the weed emporium, population me.
guy at the bar just asked how many cows we have on our land, then proceeds to ask me out. you know your from the country when....
I just fucked her in the corner of an ally while holding a large pizza waiting on a pledge for a ride.
Sometimes being bisexual is a curse. Turns out I banged both of her older twin brothers last summer.
His dick is curly. It's adorable.
Randomize
