you really are a gigantic fucking slut.
sidenote: just remembered sarcasm does not translate through text
it's probably a bad thing that i wasn't even offended, huh?
Im starting to think including a smiley face in texts may or may not be a code for 'lets have sex'
Im going to research this theory. . .
its like think what a normal person would think but completely the opposite.
Dude..TWLOHA day. gonna write LOVE on my arms before going to the bar tonight. its like a pussy guarantee.
he found my favorite bra, 3 thongs and a pair of jeans and gave them back. i love move out day.
She said just put your tongue in there and don't linger. I have other things to do.
I told my mom about how you got white girl wasted and sobbed about Whitney Houston. She sends her condolences.
tell her thanks so much
he was inside of, then got up said "we don't want you having a baby," grabbed his car keys and left. so now i'm just sitting on his bed, wondering if he's coming back.
Waking up at a teachers house is a very confusing thing
I have so many plans for this weekend and sobriety is not invited.
He blacked out and wouldnt drink anything unless he funneled it, so I made him funnel water
They offered me pot brownies in 7 minutes flat. Imagine my horror when I had to be like, are those gluten free?
Not sure who they are or where we're going but they just bought me 3 tacos so I'm staying.
Just so you know, it is really hard to rehydrate when everything is spiked with everclear.
i could have got laid, but instead, i threw up in her hair. you can cross that off the bucket list.
Randomize
