Nice. Sry i missed. Also sorry that i pissed on my toothbrush last nite
Sink seemed easy target but balance was no good
I don't remember. Are we still dating?
she wouldn't stop crying, so we sang her to sleep. i'm guessing you will find her in the same position by the toilet in the morning. night.
but he gave me mouthwash after the bj. no ones ever done that for me before.
Actually, considering the facts that I am wearing a duct tape dress and eating a gas station quesadilla, I am pretty good.
I say we go and bring jello shots with laxatives. 57% sure one of his toilets is broken
This girl came outta nowhere yelling HOLD MY DICKKKKKK!
I've slipped into the part of my life where I am not having sex to get Phils tickets from this chick. I need to seriously rethink my life decisions
We met a guy named Raymond. You called him ramen all might and told him you would eat him up, "like sex, on a budget."
Fate is real! that hot chick, Megan just showed up dressed as jasmine and I'm dressed as Aladdin this is going to be cake
My kids are NEVER playing in the park more than 2 feet away from me until they are capable of punching an eagle.
I'm more of a 'talk at me while I stare at you' kinda girl.
I know we said we never would. But try fucking a fat guy. He put in so much more effort and then made me waffles.
I wish I were single again so I could actually have sex.
I refuse to go to a doctor for a sex injury, not when I've come so far already
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