that's the second time you've been mistaken as a prostitute. maybe life is trying to tell you something
its my fault though, i'm wearing tights
you're hiking in tights? you remind me of dennis quaid's fiance in the parent trap
I asked my mom, she said yes...but you have to shower with grandpa.
So yes it WAS her period, NOT a nose bleed.
That haircut screams I'm 35 but I still eat pussy.
She told me she needed to clarify that we are not fuck buddies, we are best friends that have sex once in a while
Fucking plugged the shower with taquitos I just threw up.
They asked if I was about to puke and my response was to laugh and suddenly throw up. Continuing my asshole streak I kept laughing while still vomiting.
i cant answer while inside this church craft show. so unless you're outside with my engagement ring and a nonfat gingerbread latte, it'll have to wait.
I've never seen an uncircumcised dick in real life and the internet indicates I don't want to.
I just want to have sex that doesn't end like a B-rated horror movie.
You FaceTimed your mom in the back of the limo telling her how many guys you hooked up with at the concert
I pretty much just wake up, masturbate at least twice, and go to the beach. #Unemployed. I do look for jobs in between all that tho.
My god imagine how much cum is in that astroturf
So it turns out that a Ford Focus does not fit in a Walmart cart return.
Idk but when you think about it the last time I did bottomless mimosas I ended up getting my nipples pierced so it might be fair
Randomize
