I want to take things slow emotionally, but fast physically
He ate me out and then left in a hurry and shouted "Sorry to dine and dash" as he left my house
I need to remember that good judgment goes out the window after the 7th shot and the 3rd Lady GaGa song.
Somehow ended up at a stranger's bridal shower. Everyone else is already drunk.
I wonder if I could sublet my bathtub to anyone.
50 year old business women like dick too. Come on she said you looked like Ricky Martin.
Using the salt from a pretzel bag for tequila shots. Come over.
He puked in the funnel and continued to chug it. Who is this dude?
Putting Chia seeds in beer makes it ok for my diet, right?
I want to name my colorful bowl Batman. Why? I still have yet to figure it out. But I'm calling it Batman.
I just smoked a bowl with the lady who runs the special olympics. Your move.
What guy invites over a booty call, gets all naked and then when the real fun begins and a condom is needed, claims to not have one? And wears socks THE entire time?
If I send you a picture of a dick will you give me your honest reaction?
I just want cinnabon and vodka.
Is it too much to ask for 10 minutes of privacy while I masturbate?
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