What can I expect? While all of my friends are getting married, all of his friends are tripping on robitussin
Sooo, his balls are like... bigger than my head...
in the middle of sex he stopped to tell me that he loved me... then slapped my ass and told me "back to business"... im gonna marry him
Busta Rhymes just yelled at me! He cut a song off and I was clapping and he looked right at me and said "don't fucking clap." I was that white guy.
morning after pill = breakfast in bed
Kayla got stiches in her face. Rode in an ambulance shotgun. Tried to steal a baby, thought it was mine
Also while I am being the bigger person I plan on bringing over something strong smelling and/or alcoholic to torture the poor hungover bastard
Also, just had a student offer to sell me Xanax. Want some? Just for like a rainy day. Or our memorial day shitshow. Or just another Wednesday night.
Bro. Some kids just drive-by judged the shit outta me.
Ohmygod. I don't know if I can explain how great it'll be. I hope you don't mind Subaru sex
Moonshine marathon is never a good idea
It's like the first time your mom catches you masturbating. We both know what she saw. We're just not talking about it...
He put those pics of him with those girls on facebook and tagged his wife in them
Tequila 1 marriage 0
I'm glad we can *facepalm* it together over the married couple we fucked separately.
I just had a visual of u banging and screaming at him at the same time.
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