So im pretty sure the object of my emotional onterest is tired of playing with me....
Fat chicks shouldn't bartend
we did shots in class this morning as part of a presentation. WHY AM I LEAVING THIS COUNTRY?!
You have dresses for different occasions. I need different men's dicks too. It's logic.
Only sluts go out in this weather carpe diem boys
i think the title to my autobiography shall be, "a bottle of vodka and various pieces of meat"
and this is why you're my favorite gay friend.
I got punched in the face by a Cowboy last night. Then he bought me a beer cause o convinced security not to kick him out the bar. Start of a fairytale love story? I think so.
Aside from the possibility of pregnancy, I'm going to call last night a raging success.
I noticed while having sex on Friday that I have great endurance. CrossFit works.
It's now officially the Christmas season, so I have no shame in drinking evernog.
I came over to get dick...not to watch you vacuum....at 2 AM
I smell like heartbreak.
Tequila and sloppy rebound sex?
How did you know?
My boss and I ended up at the same strip club. We both got lap dances while talking about work.
Turns out dignity is priceless and Plan B costs $41.09
I love you so much and not just because your dick is perfect
Randomize
