I can't get into him, he looks really young. I'd feel like I was blowing the Gerber baby.
I woke up this morning to 4 booty call texts. So i am trying to find the sign that says i like to sit on cocks so that i can take it off.
trust me, i wonder where that sign is on a daily basis.
it looked like a condom graveyard when i woke up. they were everywhere
She carries her pencils in a crown royal bag... Need I say more?
I mean, I know they're ugly, but I cant turn down a birthday threesome.
The entire defensive line took care if me when I passed out. One of them even held my hair when I puked and the other carried me upstairs to bed. God I love football so much more now
I take it we used my cleavage as a pen holder last night during the graffiti party. Looks like the colours of Crayola exploded all over my chest
I didn't want to walk to anymore parties because I found a cat. It was magical.
Oh ya, I forgot to tell you, last night I woke up to the sound of you peeing on the floor next to the fridge, didn't remember until now. Have fun at Dayton!
he said we should drink responsibly and we all just kinda sat there laughing at him
Nah. After about 5 shots he decided he needed to clean the gutters. We're headed to the hospital now so meet us there.
" my drug dealer just stopped by and did an elmo impression for my 2 year old nephew."
Excuse me while I gouge out my eyes.
In which case my work here is done.
THAT'S NOT NICE
NEITHER WAS PROMISING NOT TO TAKE MY SISTER'S VIRGINITY, THEN PROMPTLY DOING SO
my liver is dry heaving
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