Haha im about to meet my shrink &i have so much shit to tell him i made an outline
i just successfully used the word "hymen" in a paper...welcome to senior seminar in lit.
Who would win... a chainsaw pooping pterodactyl or a bear with machine guns for feet. big debate about this right now
I think you blew our chances when you yelled "YOU SLUTS COMING TO THE TITTIE BAR?" in their face
I just don't know what he sees in my vagina...and that scares me.
Wondering when "babysitting" formed into "sleeping on the couch for five hours nursing a hangover and giving the kids Nyquil."
We need to be on the same page regarding the 3some this time. No more "one of us should probably leave" moments.
I dnt think she needs convincing on the threesome part, it's the threesome with your roommate situation that needs some work
420 is off to a bad start. Mark wake/baked WAY too much, and he has spent over $50 on the claw machine in the grocery store.
hes that one kid that offered to spoon after staring at me for 5 minutes
I'm officially no longer allowed to make any of my own decisions regarding alcohol, men, or the combination of both. Thats up to you now. Do me proud.
I seriously doubt I'm gonna be able to properly put your dick in my mouth whilst upside down, but I'm willing to give it my best shot
I'm worried about your health. And your boobs. Actually, health, then boobs. Health first, boobs second. And third.
Kids parked next to me are getting it on. I'm eating chicken nuggets listening to Kanye alone. Happy Valentine's Day.
When you wanted to give that guy at McDonalds your number you asked the cashier if you could borrow "a pen or just like a straw with his blood on it". He gave you a pen.
Randomize
