wtf. i just found you're porn stash.
u like it?
NOT THE POINT.
we're microwaving frozen margaritas its not the same without u
sounds like you fell off the wagon.
fuck falling off. at this point, the wagon is a dot on the horizon.
we've been together for three years, and i still get excited when i know i'm going to give him a blow job. it's that kind of love
Lost my virginity in a banana suit. Glad I waited.
the fact that we had sex in the dining hall makes it seem so much more like home.
omg. i wish i could describe to you the number of things that were just in my vagina. i feel like i got gangbanged by construction workers.
I'm going to call you, don't answer. Need to practice moaning to your answering machine again
i figure if i show enough tits, no one will notice my eyebrows.
. Drop what your doing. Were going to Knoxville for midget wrestling. It's the championship.we can NOT miss this.
Hey, met you at the bar last night. You probably dont remember my name. You and your friends came back to my place, you shattered my window with your fist then dipped. Your gonna need to pay for that.
Thats where this cut came from! Thanks for piecing together the puzzle dude.
GUESS WHO STILL HAS BOTH NIPPLES!
Nothing kills the mood like him going to slap my ass and he hits his balls at the same time
I saw a spider on my bed and my first reaction was to throw my weed bag to safety
Any man who can do squats while fucking you is a man worth keeping.
Randomize
