whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
like if someone fucked a dictionary but instead of having a penis, it was just one of those leap frog educational toys
I hope to god you are high
There is no way when we get home that nothing will hapen
At any point in time, have you stopped and thought "I wonder how high Willie Nelson is right now?
Just mixed my liver cleanse with Bacardi. Best. Thing. Ever.
We started snorting MDMA at 3 in the afternoon...it was never going to end well.
just drunkenly made mashed potatoes at midnight. what have you done for your calorie intake lately?
Did they have a limo or was i just stoned?
He tried to eat me out in the bath... I said it was a bad idea, but he said it was good snorkelling practice for vaca.
I'm not as easy in Europe as I am in the US
Only because you can wipe your slut slate clean & start anew. It's a little known benefit of our currency exchange.
I burst into tears on the boat this morning because we bumped a duck in the head. I am way too hung over for today
They think its so cute and admirable that I learned French. BITCH HAVE YOU NEVER HEARD OF GOOGLE TRANSLATE? sexting foreign bitches, there's an app for that
You know your horny when you have a sex dream about Ace Ventura, if your wondering he's awful
bought a large fruitopia from McDonalds at 7:45 this morning. Spilled it on the ground. Cried. THAT hungover.
Also apparently I made a "cake sandwich"--yeah smashed a massive piece of cake between two slices of bread....fucking tequila
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