you started crying because you didn't get to wear your rainboots this week so i turned on the shower and let you jump around in it
youre the best friend ever
So, I picked up my 7 ft tall lamp post and used it to close my door. I feel quite accomplished.
It just hit me that I woke up to you in a bear suit. Explain.
I don't really want to explain to you right now but i just ate laundry detergent
Of all the things I am low enough to do, how could you even doubt if that was one of them?
aaaaaand im pretty certain i told that boy i just met that "his balls better be out tomorrow"
I feel like we had some profound moment last night, but I can't really recall much past your ass turning up the volume on the radio.
I heard liver failure is in for 2012 anyways
Could have been worst, could have seen me bent over biting her carpet while her son was inside me, i think i would have respnded with "i was just trying to be quiet"
I don't know. I was hiding and the bed was banging. I am going to sleep now in someone's car.
he said we should drink responsibly and we all just kinda sat there laughing at him
You threw up in your own shoe then wore it home
I'm gonna guess ur still high cus last night at like 3am my pillows were morphing into cats and I kept trying to pet them
I'm not gonna lie. I need sex like plants need water right now. I just need the dick.
i think we reached that point in our drunkenness where even the creeps found us intolerable
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