i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
after watching ten minutes of "the decision," I conclude that King Lebron has more influence on America than Barak Obama. I love our countries values.
I have an asthmatic alcoholic for a roommate. That can't be safe.
It's like salsa. But with balls in it. I like to call it balsa
Remind me again why sleeping with a coworker and his wife would be a terrible idea.
hungover and i feel like a burrito
like eating one or like you are one?
like i am one.
Why yes actually, getting stoned and reading an AARP magazine IS totally where I wanted my night to end!
She's going to get me a sippy cup for christmas. If I can't open it, I can't have any more to drink. Seem reasonable?
can we get vodka so I have an excuse for being an emotional wreck
New year means new boundaries for the Brazilian lady.. I'm pretty sure I got wax on my asshole
Just followed a blind kid around for 20 minutes to see how awesome his guide dog was. And he was pretty fucking awesome
Shit on my own feet while puking from my hangover. Is this what 33 is supposed to be like?
I think I'm just going to go like every guy on tinder who has a jetski. I'm doing this for us, Summer is coming.
Pray for me. I just had a sex dream about Debbie Wasserman-Schultz.
Randomize
