nothing tight i'm going to stuff myself with food and alchy
So I don't have any furniture but we just skateboard drunk around the floor.
Why do you keep getting laid in MY dreams
she was passed out on the moving sidewalks in the airport, we NEED to travel more often
Either way you look at it, I'm a slut. But either way I look at it, I'm having a fucking blast.
they just started filling water ballons with vodka.
on my way.
I knew we would be good together when you made me lick jameson off your boob while you screamed along with racks on racks
3 guesses about who had to still-drunkenly facilitate a fire drill at 2:40am because freshmen can't handle microwave popcorn.
I think they were making kool-aid in my bed. There is lots of sugar and my hands and face are stained blue.
I wrapped my scarf around his head and then made him go down on me
And I also said, "probe me"
In your drunken glory you promised me, tongue, 12 naked pics, and 1,800 breakfasts.
He will be forever remembered as "birthday failure" ...Got him to pierce his tongue in my bathroom, but not sleep with me......
This fucking storm better not ruin my sex plans this weekend
I wish drug dealers had sales for the holidays
now whenever i pass that house all i can think about is how i pooped in their yard..
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