I want to tell you about my weekend in person so I can see your look of judgement and disgust.
I went to class with the sex aroma on me. The hot sun doesn't help much.
please promise me that no matter what happens you will keep me away from the children
Make sure your heart doesn't explode. These are words of wisdom.
The more and more I think about it, the more I realize... it's not ok to just pull over on the side of the highway to pee... I'm sorry I argued that
That would be a dream come true. Seriously, he's like my mount everest, my life's ambition is to climb him.
you passed out while setting up your phones timer to time how long it would take before you to passed out.
Who showers for four hours?!
It was like a tropical nap.
You called me a pussy and continued to eat an entire jar of peanut butter with only your hand.
My boobs are numb because I've been using them as stress balls
Cancun blessed me with a drinking problem
I think he's like Cher he's going to live forever but not as scary looking
So the door man at the local dispensary started giving me motivational talks about my beard...
What do you mean not that crazy? I had sex last night. with my\nBOSS. in the restaurant where we WORK.... ON A DINNER TABLE.
we went book shopping, so yes this relationship is going to be about more than sex
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