Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
were not allowed back there because i puked on the waitresses foot while trying to order another round. for myself.
i bet even starving children in Africa take the crust off their poptarts
I just bought 1/2 a fifth of vodka out of an old school baby carriage from a homeless man. Gotta love this city.
Thanks for the drunken voicemail of bird calls. Love and miss you, too.
idk. I was on the deck with Dominic and i felt something weird on my arm. I looked down and you were licking my elbow.
Look, as a friend I'm asking to see a picture of his tiny dick
I just want to see him this morning so I can bask in my wasted accomplishment.
I drew a giraffe.. But she did say that bumped that test up from a 39 to a 40. It's the little things.
We started off talking about nice cuddling and you turned it into fucking with a Santa hat on...
You were a hurricane of blowjobs and glitter makeup. You came out of the closet and took the house down with it
And you will die and be carried in a backpack before I allow you not to comply in this tomfoolery.
How did I get the fat lip, while puking I may or may not have sneezed... Wacking my face into the toilet bowl...
Ugh. I need to go to the store, but I'm too lazy. Whatever shall I do? That girls still passed out. I should steal her car
I HATE BEING THIS HIGH FML IT'S LIKE I'M MAKING UP FOR ALL THE 4:20S I DIDNT DO ALL AT ONCE
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