I just added her as a friend on Facebook. I met her 5 minutes ago and there are already more than 50 pics of me uploaded... from other nights.
You were rubbing sand all over yourself and everyone else and claiming you were "EXFOLIATING."
if i can get a chik with a dibaetes pump naked a sling certainly isnt going to get in my way
Just came during my obgyn appt. I need to get laid.
You can identity the picture as me the mistress his wife and him. It's that kinda awkard.
Def just hooked up with my brother's senior prom date in his bed. Does that make me the worst brother ever?
trust me, you don't know shame until you're in a peacock costume getting CPR by random dudes
My taste buds are fucked up, everything tastes like fire after last night.
He can keep it, but if he asks for anything else i'm just going to start pissing on things.
Woke up on the couch with one cowboy boot on and a hat over my crotch. God bless texas.
Did you clean his pubes up off the table yet?
I went in the hotel's jacuzzi fully clothed, threw up in the bathroom half an hour later and woke up naked next to Dr. Seuss' "Oh the Places You'll Go"
OMFG I JUST SEARCHED DILDO ON THE WORK SHARED AMAZON ACCOUNT!!!!!
How can I prove that I give 401k advice and not handjobs?
Can you imagine doing supermarket sweep in a sex store? What's the sex store equivalent of a whole ham?
Randomize
