Nicole vs. Life
Where does it all go? I've busted inside of you like 10 times in the last week.
Today was my first day of hebrew and I learned how to say give me sex... I think I can quit now
He somehow managed to bang-mail me last night. I woke up this morning to a voicemail from 1:54 a.m. of moaning and screaming. I now know how talented he is and how annoying I am to have sex with.
Worst ten minutes of my life, it's was like trying to put a marshmallow in a piggy bank....
His body is just chiseled out of sex. I would let that man do anything to my body. Including fuck me while my parents watch
I AM SUCH A BETTER PERSON ON DRUGS
Never backflip into an above ground pool. I think the gash will be smaller by Monday though.
Never thought I'd say this but the maple syrup flavored vodka probably wasn't our best idea
at one point, i told him to buy you a pumpkin spice latte and uggs because you're a common white girl and that's how he should get you in bed
Lesson learned:nothing good comes from an at home wax kit.
Yeah just pls explain the dishes and the dildo. I don't want to lose my job over a dick in the cooler.
They were so sore! Either I have bed bugs or you were biting my nipples last night and don't lie to me.
You know you're out of shape when you're sore after masturbating.
I've decided it's okay if I take a pregnancy test every month. Then I can be like, "Good job, self, way to not procreate this month!"
Randomize
