Dude ... paraplegic porn is really creative..
I'm seeing double. Its like being in a room full of people
Weird shit dude, I just realized that the girl I fucked last night looks like Shaun White's twin sister. I dunno if I should be scared or turned on
I hope her Double McTwist was as good as his
imagine how many guys you'd have sex if you didn't recieve your monthly gift.
I didn't know how to tell her I was too busy getting stoned and making a baked potato to meet up and finish our group project.
She said I had the biggest dick she'd ever seen. And when you consider how many she's come in contact with, it's kind of like winning the heisman.
how is telling me how long you drunkenly fucked someone supposed to make me miss you?
There's a patch of dead grass from where you would notoriously throw up after every good night in July. This summer was great.
So apparently using the emergency exit of the bar as a bathroom is frowned upon in this establishment...
Sorry, fell into some ass. Call you tomorrow.
I got back and Katie was asleep holding a burrito. I woke her up and she ate it and passed back out.
Is there evidence of another human being getting away with this/ not dying?
It's barely past noon, how am I already talking about double penetration
My mom's yelling at me for being a whore and my dad's quizzing me on how to drive in winter weather....I'm home!
So, 'head before the store' turned into a fuck fest, & that's how I ended up at the grocery store smelling like a cum farm on Black Friday. How's your weekend?
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