i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
There is no way when we get home that nothing will hapen
he recorded me cumming with the t-pain app on his iphone
i got excepted to unl lol
You mean "accepted".
I don't make the first move. Ever. Unless were playing monopoly cause that's my shit
Apparently you need a permit for a flamethrower.
At 4 am, making my walk of shame, the hotel security followed me to my car with his flashlight shined directly on me. I felt like either a criminal or like I was about to get raped. Can't a girl sneak out of a hotel room without an actual spotlight on her?!?!?!
Technically he's married but he says it's "not like that" even tho his wife lives with him. Not sure if I believe him but I'm sleeping with him anyway.
If you're not going to call the girls I bring around by name, at least don't call them by number. It's been cockblocking since girl #47. Dick.
In the ER with Chelz, I may have broken her ankle during sex. Lovely.
if anyone knows where my shirt is please let me know and if you know why I don't have my own shirt please also let me know. also do any of you know why I'm missing a bra wire?
ever since I turned 21 the mother-daughter bonding sessions always end with whiskey and my little pony. I don't know why, it's just a thing that happens
i swear to god it was like we were fucking in 9 dimensions
Like I'm not tryna become president or marry a doctor or some shit here, like one level above garbage is all I'm asking for
Can we do lunch at 3? I have a blowjob scheduled for 2.
You schedule blowjobs?
Randomize
