turns out gay frats are just like normal frats, only with more v-necks
There is a banner on a house by campus that says "welcome to college dads. Thanks for dropping off your daughters!"
i feel as if its time to shave my pubes but i should wait until before the party. nobody likes a sloppy drunk girl with a stubble-crotch.
story of my life.
2 out of 3 people here lost their shoes. America.
I vagually remember taking your birthcontrol and washing it down with ash water
You offered me some of your "Jungle Juice." It was just 151 and Absinthe. I don't know how you are still alive.
The best part about being single is knowing how much everyone secretly creeps behind their gf/bfs back. You wouldn't believe..Have a great date night!
You sent me a picture of you licking the bottom of a shoe and the caption was "it tastes like shoe"
You'd love her. She's outspoken like us. And appreciates a big penis and a strong drink.
The only thing that got rode last night was the shit face train. I brought him home to see wht all the hype was about and he just started crying and puking in my bathroom.
Jesus, I think this onesie was designed to keep me from masturbating.
There was a comma in between her and dick. I was calling you a dick. Jesus.
I was on tinder the whole time I was waiting for my pregnancy test results at the doctors.
You're a disaster
Wanna date?
Well, we went shopping. He bought me starbucks and ate me out in the change room at target. If that isnt the best post covid first date, I don't know what is
Randomize
