yo i stole a wine glass from the ritz but i spilled wine on my hundo dolla shirt
She told me she got a 15 on her A.C.T.. that's when I knew it was a done deal.
People were autographing me. I'm like the spring break yearbook
right before he busted, he moaned the british are coming.
only on the fourth of july.
Just finished putting caution tape around the tv. Sober me needs to prepare.
He told me to put on my big boy pants, then take them off and fuck her before he smacks me with a chair. His pep talks suck.
I forgot how wholesome of a place a park is when youre not drinking there.
Drunk cheerio confetti may seem like a brilliant idea when your drunk, but believe me, the next day, its a horrible, horrible mess.
Well I went on a freakin rampage and destroyed a fan and claimed that it wasn't doing its fan duties... Then I knocked on everybody's doors in the hall and asked if they were content with their fan's performance and if not I would take care of it...
So would it be tacky to offer my services as a future attorney as an engagement gift for her?
his finger was half off and he was more concerned that he wasnt at home shooting cucumbers out of his potato gun.
I'll always remember 2012 as the year I hooked up with countless girls who had the sides of their heads shaved.
All is fair in love and war and toga parties
Not sure. He doesn't know where New York is on a map but he gives an incredible spanking.
Who cares about New York?
I just put on lipstick to sext him. That should tell you where my love life is at.
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