And then falling down drunk the next morning, concussing yourself and splitting your head open?
That was pretty sad, but you more than made up for it by using "concussing" in a sentence
i woke up to my roommate spraying cooking spray on my legs. fourth time this has happened. not cool.
Either she got face surgery at midnight, or i need to stop drinking...
Nhdgh I love you very much hello becausevs. Vagina pensiono
worst night to have a conscience
Well i then put my mattress in my closet and am currently on it. This is a new one.
i think i can safely say that is the weirdest thing you've ever propositioned me with. so obviously my answer is yes.
your cat followed me a mile away from your house. if it doesn't come back, i'm sorry, but I needed to get laid tonight.
Exactly. Motivated vaginas are the best kind of vagina
I'm busy watching infomercials. I'd say I'll join you later, but I'm doing a shot every time they demonstrate how difficult life is WITHOUT this product. So I doubt I'll be able to walk in another... Maybe 40 minutes.
But feel free to join! A new infomercial starts in 12 minutes.
I received a sext from my girlfriend, and a deal for free chips and guacamole at chipotle at the same time. I have tasted heaven, and it is beautiful.
I don't think I'm gonna survive today. I don't remember how to walk. I must crawl 6 blocks to my bed.
He was doing dishes, naked. I dropped to my knees and gave him head. Teamwork level- pro..
I have post one night stand depression
I had Mac n cheese made with weed butter last night. Epic
Randomize
