He had an itunes playlist named "def not Glee season 1" which contained all of Glee season 1
I hate thxgiving break now because that totally means I'm not able to have sex for a week.
So, right as I'm cumming, I pull out and go "PYEW PYEW" like Star Wars lasers. Best part is, I missed her completely.
The working title of my paper? "Tailgating: A Big Clusterfuck of Kids Who Dont Actually Give a Shit about Football"
i just bought plan b at the bus station. happy holidays and welcome to a new level of white trashiness.
hi sober isdnt real. this is a mass rtoomate taext i thing. bye
AMAZING.
I remember desperately screaming that I love my life and running in zig zags all the way home
Just ate tuna on a frozen waffle because we were out of bread.
This is why you don't have nice things.
I literally just smashed open my grade school piggy bank for beer money. Goodbye childhood. Hellllllo coin night.
Saved a second guy who was crying/on the verge of wigging out. Just call me the drug whisperer.
The first guy I ever sexted is having a baby.. Is this what adulthood feels like?
Overheard a drunk girl talk about how when she's drunk she believes in more than one God
It was fine. Until I accidentally shit on his floor.
So we'll go out later for condoms and cake batter... aka grocery shopping for champions.
Everyone needs to leave the house so I can use the good vibrator without being judged.
Randomize
