Ugh now I'll have to carry around an overnight bag to all the bars I visit tonight. but hey! maybe I'll meet a dude! And need it!
someone owes me an orgasm
capt morgan doesn't hurt if you honestly believe it's golden flavored kool-aid.
tonight, alcohol would be proud of us
he took off his pants and apologized in advance if I thought he was too small.
in the morning i found her name, number and address on one of the empty pizza boxes. also said "ps. if you find my shoes please mail to me."
She said she wanted to have closure sex.
Please come back. She just stuck her bloody band-aid to Zach's face, has a fire extinguisher, and is talking about tornados hiding.
Sex aside I am really scared about Syria...
Who are you to come into MY house and tell me when I can or cannot take my pants off?
Also I feel I should tell you last night when I came home I fell into my laundry hamper and woke up in a pile of my clothes
after sex he fell asleep with his water bottle in one hand and his dick in the other at 6pm. I'm a winner.
On a side note, my ex husband offered to buy me shrooms
Sex in the backyard? Check.
She pooped on me during a reverse cowgirl. And it wasn't a little bit either.
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