I'll buy you a vibrator, we can get married for tax benefits, and live happily ever after with lots of doggggs.
I had a good time, probably would have a bigger headache today if you were in town.
What time do you think the pilgrims started drinking? I want to be as accurate as possible.
you poured 3 beers into an empty vase and then passed out, so i drank them for you. don't say i'm not a good friend.
I need to write the inventor of adderall a thank you note stapled to a copy of my degree
I found out during it when he said "my girlfriend never does this" so he's all to blame, I had no idea until half way through.
Just fell asleep during a bikini wax. Thank god for day drinking.
Something strange is happening to me, I think I miss hooking up with girls sober
He's either jacking off or listening to Kanye West.
If it makes you feel any better... I have a friend who found out her mom was in the video for 2 Live Crew's "Pop That Pussy"
He is sitting on the foor in the soup aisle saying "to each their own soup"
Ok. As long as I can keep Kevin contained to the room I'll be ok. If not u might have a naked puking Kevin at ur door
I can still be you friend and be there for you. And sometimes get drunk and fuck you.
i found you laying on the floor staring at the ceiling and you kept muttering "why" in various inflections.
you don't need to worry about using proper grammar if you're asking for the size of his dick.
Randomize
