I bet he comes in French.
And, I saw Emily's panties. How? She doesn't sit like a lady.
I can’t believe the potential orgy I left behind at Waffle House.
Michael Bay diarrhea
I just woke up my dad to tell him that i made out with the drummer. He wasnt as excited as I was.
Wait, how do girls masturbate?
I dunno we use shower heads I guess.
..how does it fit?
the facebook you made of my ass has 10 times more friends than i do.
He gets creativity points for the hot sauce. But it may be awhile until my nipples forgive him
Dude your neighbors are having a garage sale. They were judging me as I walk of shamed back to my car.
I DON'T WANT TO KNOW THE SCIENTIFIC REASONING BEHIND WHY I STARTED A HAREM ESPECIALLY NOT FROM A GUY IN THE HAREM!
On the upside, no one went to the hospital! Lex's friend was definitely on fire at one point last night though because he tried to juggle tiki torches. He was shirtless this morning and smelled like a BBQ.
Oh dear God, they have a song about Mom...
that's what I'm here for. I'm literally just bad advice mixed with motivational sentences.
Literally had sex in his grow room under a plant.. ganja queen .
I really need to get a comfy set of masturbating shoes
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