Lost. The hour! Funtime!!!!
she just gave her compliments to the chief, at dennys
If your dick isn't up when i get home you're catching tonight.
By the way, she says hi. At least I think she did since she licked my phone
the spit in my mouth is still 99% not mine.
Boxed wine mondays was one of our finer ideas
As you were leaving the bar you grabbed a table and when they stopped you, you said "Its cool i came in with this". They did not believe you.
i'm way too high for it to be safe that i just discovered i have a fire extinguisher
True enough. Do you ever think that these girls grandparents ghosts are watching you masterbate to their granddaughters and look at you in Shame?
I'm going to fake an anxiety attack to get to the front of the line. Save me some brisket.
...I'm not a booty call or a pizza...you can't just call/text and expect to be eating me in an hour..
the good news is that even if it's Alex's, I can still say it's Colin's, because the kid will come out ginger anyway!
who knew there'd be a plus side to your ginger fetish one day?
It is a fiery spray of napalm-covered beautiful words that leave a flaming "fuck you" on the ground after I destroy him.
You know you had a good time when you get the wheelchair treatment in Mexico back to your cruise.
she's p upset bro
Where is he. I have a sword.
Randomize
