just met our mailman at a party, he asked me out. i said yes, but only if he picks me up in the mail truck. how jealous are you
halloween costumes for girls are easy, slutty teacher, slutty cop, slutty nurse, etc...
exactly, that's why i want something interesting
slutty neuroscientist?
He had a stripper pole in his bedroom. I didn't know whether to be impressed or creeped out.
I just remembered yelling "they're gonna let me be a lawyer! Me! Why would they do that?"
Have invented new cocktail. Any flavor of crystal light and vodka. I call it "I am going to die alone"
I feel like the other woman.
You ARE the other woman.
Every man needs a table where they can sit and reflect on the successful penile conquests of the day.
Hahaha it was a great moment in my life. This must be what post child birth feels like, given you don't get a combined asshole/ vagina
I think i was just meant to be a stripper. A ballerina stripper cat
he wouldnt let me in bed until i took off all the stickers i was covered in
He said "you speak American pretty good for a Canadian" and it took everything in me to still fuck him. Dry spell ended btw
I just coughed and my vagina hurt. We need to hook up more.
Just saw a government minister puke and rally.
Would seriously like to slash his tires but then I feel like I'd have to deal with him longer.
Word to the wise, never look up your hot young doctors on Facebook before you're discharged. You will find things and no longer be able to take them seriously.
Randomize
