He told me he had never done that before...I responded with "clearly"
I feel fat after drinking my meal replacement shake.
I added chocolate sauce, a bsg of m&ms and a crushed up brownie to make it taste better.
They past out watching a re-run of the 1984 presidential debate on cspan
possible father of this baby just finished his test first in a lecture of 200 people. other possible father finished about 100th.
I'm rooting for #1.
According to last night if you on the sidewalk at 12 a|m\nYour a WHORE !
Condom broke. Took her to CVS for plan B and parked in expectant mothers spot. I laughed.. she cried
I told him the truth. Truth leads to vodka. Vodka leads to tequila. Tequila leads to prison.
HOLY SHIT HE'S TRYING TO EAT HIS FOOT. THIS IS THE BEST DAY OF MY LIFE.
Long story short, the rash from your last birthday party told me not to go to this one.
I hate when people see you passed out in your front yard and call 911. Like what, you can't take a nap face down on your steps at 4pm?
You could breast feed yourself wine!! This shit is genius!
You can't find true love with Budweiser and a futon
He literally named all the parts of the vagina as he fingered me. No more pre-med virgins.
i just had to pick up my 18 year old cousin from the police station for hosting a party, and i had to do this stoned wow
So I can officially say that someone has licked whipped cream off my nipples. Go senior year
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