honestly, magaritas are the void men can't fill.
chasing shots of tequilla with sun chips. its doable but not recommended
I didn't cheat on him. Cheating means finding out. I made sure he was at work first. After the guy left I got shitfaced just so nothing seemed out of the ordinary when he came home.
There's nothing worse than waking up naked on the beach covered in sand and a family walking by.
He hid IN a snowbank for 2 hours waiting for me to come home. This game has to stop before someone dies.
Going to have to start putting down newspaper if puking the bed is going to be a habit
Two questions: what are you doing RIGHT NOW? and do you know how to drive a golf cart?
please bring me a paper towel asap.
I was drinking wine in bed and spilt some on my chest.. And I cautiously guided it into my belly button but now I dont know what to do.
I find out next week of the Australian was lying about his vasectomy or not. Keep your fingers crossed!
Yaaaayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy! It has more than one y so my intentions to sleep with you after the drink special ends are clear
Brightest idea yet: lets drink enough at ladies-drink-free nights to make up for the cost of tampons. Breaking even on having vaginas!
Our first order of business as new roommates was to test the sex acoustics of our rooms. I need a new box spring.
Ones vagina should not have the same slogan as a can of Pringles.
Because sadly the idea of me having a girlfriend is crazy enough to be an April fools prank
I refuse to fake an orgasm. If I'm dating him, he better work for that shit.
Randomize
