just witnessed a squirrel raping another squirrel. i couldn't look away.
My cat gives me a boner
The look your mother gives you when she sees you masterbating on web cam is unlike any I've seen before, but this is a case where, I would say, ignorance is bliss.
she wrote "SORRY" in her vomit and left
i just walked into thanksgiving and three people in a row asked me who i was. really?
So I vaguely remember making out with you this morning, I think you were on a date?
Im in his room watching him sleep. Im going to try and jerk off and not get caught by the nurse.
The usual, bring face make up, I have a weird gash on my nose, probably from my one night stand
He came on my face. Threw a towel at me. Stole my weed. And left. I thought this would be over after we graduated?
She had one of those kid princess beds. I asked how she expected to fuck on that and she just said "thats what the slide is for". I've never wanted to marry a one night stand before.
So, I'm a little drunk in Seattle with Glenna, but we've all agreed that it's patriotic to think about Bill Clinton from time to time during sex. 'Merica
You missed the winter stoner olympics last night....I got the gold in blunt rolling
high moment I think I just reached personal nirvana
I just had sex on my kitchen counter. It's like the American dream
I've had sex near too many of the blankets to let our parents touch them like this
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