I DID IT WITH MY SOCKS ON!
im covered in puffy paint and glitter i cant find kevin and im wearing shoes that dont belong to me....come get me please
my mom used to put diet coke in my bottle. i can pretty much handle anything.
cell reception changed and I can no longer text you from the toilet... that means I'll be texting you less often, just fyi
random question: do you know anywhere in the tri-state that has elephant racing? this is a work related question.
I'm legit concerned I might pass out this weekend from having too much sex.
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
it was like lady and the tramp only with a jello shot on the pool table
At one point last night I over heard you say " I'm gonna puke in a bag and pour it down your throat" I LOVE YOU.
I can already see the regret in her eyes. Amazing night. This city rules.
Have you ever realized how cool bread is? Like so many things taste good on it. Like its crazy to think that peanut butter and turkey can both taste good on the same thing.
I'm a drunk white girl and my ancestors were drunk white girls, if we apologized our species would be extinct.
I wanna borrow his axe at this point and cut my head open just to relieve some pressure
Is it wrong for me to wish my cat had arms to get me a beer?
I’m not washing my pussy with handsoap.
Randomize