First thing she said after sex was.. are you baptised by chance?
I haven't shaved so I have to behave myself. I'm going to do this from now on.
nothing says platonic group sex like a campfire and smores
I'm tuning in to watch Heidi Montag crash and burn on the Miss Universe Pageant. Somebody call 911. and I'm not talking about the Sean Kingston song.
The cops found weed in michael jacksons house today...it makes up for the child molesting, I like him more now.
I fucked her on my hockey bag. it doesnt get any more Canadian than that.
just went to my meeting with last nights make up still on, not wearing a bra, and the 14 shot tallies still on my wrist.. My advisor's questions should be answered as to why I'm not in my major yet.
I just found a thank you note I apparently wrote to my bed last night for letting me borrow the comforter.
dude i woke up sitting indian style with my face on the ground and my hand in a bucket of ice.
You showed up to your dad's bday dinner late, dirty, and hungover then proceeded to yell at the bartender for trying to take advantage of you by putting extra bourbon in your drink... Highly doubt you win best daughter award.
All i've had today is coffee and ketchup packets. I need a job like yesterday.
How are you feeling?
Hungover as shit. Someone just knocked on my window to make sure I was alive. I have been sleeping in the drivers seat for an hour parked outside my store. That is how okay I am.
If I'm going to risk life and limb to wear a Wings jersey to the Garden next week, the least they can do is win.
And the most would be ending up in bed with one of them.
If it's any consolation, I made really strong brownies yesterday and had 3 and then I saw demons
He was talking about his friends deceased ferret and I still managed to orgasm.
Now THAT is dedication!
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