i think he might wanna be bffs again, but idk cause we're friends again but we haven't been bff since like a year. i don't know what to think...
wow. what a nail bitter. i need popcorn for this. brb
All time low... just gave a strip tease to the theme song from Law&Order SVU.
Apparently they shut down a cook out cause people were selling drugsout the drive thru. Nice to be home
He wanted me to blow him while he was playing guitar hero. there will not be a second date
How long is the appropriate time period between a pregnancy scare and breaking up with my girlfriend?
Do you think I can haggle my way to discounted weed on 4.21?
Your last words were "i'm gonna motorboat the bartender." then you commenced with an attempted motorboat
beware of the wheat thins...there might be a knife in it
Atty had lunch with DA and confirmed I am not the target of the investigation. No word on anything else
I elbow dropped a bag of ice to break it so we could make margaritas. I bled everywhere. Be proud.
She just mixed her Emergen-C with champagne... Vegas here we come!
His mom walking in on us having sex was probably the highlight of the night
Sorry I crashed a riding mower into your garage door. No hard feelings??
Well you could have stayed home, played house and got blow jobs all weekend babe, but we all have to live with our decision
I feel like any time there's that much rope, lingerie, and horse masks on the ground, it's safe to say it was a great night
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