oh no, I think we did it in the 'front asshole'
I just wish we had the ability to download food from our TVs.
Don't judge me. He's really sexy for a 17 year old. We made nasty in the womens bathroom at the beach. Don't worry. I wore sandals in there.
None of that is ok.
i'm glad we're now at the level of friendship where we can comfortably discuss the quality of our shit
I got a handjob to the OC theme song. It was like going back in time 7 years.
I've never known a guy to fuck more random girls in the ass then Dom. His rectal kill ratio is at like 85%
He's like the Derek Jeter of Anal
truck drivers should not leave their trucks unlocked with cigarettes inside when we're drunk and walking around.
I woke up in an apt hallway this morning and a nice lady brought me coffee cause she thought I was homeless
In honor of Sarah Palin's bday I suggest we watch Nailing Palin
the bad thing about being great at twerking is that I'm powerless to stop myself from doing it when I'm drunk and in public.
We go out, we get drunk, we watch Star Wars, we pass out. What's wrong with this tradition?
this hospital has no fireball
Why does your life consist of lesbians, black guys and cats?
Edible... I FEEL CLOSER TO THE UNIVERSE AND I DEF TRAVELED IN TIME. I THINK I CAN READ MINDS NOW.
All I'm saying is there better be a bow on your dick for my birthday
Randomize