If she sucks any more cock I swear she will be a spermivore
i am exhausted. it's been years. we both know his dick is small. the jig is up.
2010 has been the year of the Eskimo brother. Let's see how many igloos we can shack in next year
He has a clip art-style heart tattooed on his hip. I hated him way before I saw his tiny dick.
Just walk straight and zig zag through cars tell you get to the road. That's where I am. Perpendicular to the doors do not make any turns
Your place is a magnet for either righteous parties or crippling alcohol dependency. Lets find out which together
Whiskey dick has taught us to be smart with our time.
I threw up in the kitchen on the floor and a guy tried cleaning it up with a spoon at a party.
moms trying to set me up with a 28 year old. hes graduated university like im getting high in my bed and he's an adult
I'm starting to think that birthday sex is just an urban legend. Like the boogey man, and woman orgasms.
I just added Tubthumping to the playlist for tonight. This is going to make or break the party.
I may have had several rum punches and then gone to the store and used European cucumbers to prove my baton twirling prowess.
I just bought spray paint, a T-shirt, and a box of magnum condoms. The cashier refused to make eye contact! Haha
I just upped my southern womanhood. Taking whiskey and Kleenex pocket packs to the funeral.
It's bullshittery. It's asshattery. It's complete fuckery at its finest.
Randomize
