how come everytime i call mom shes doing tequila shots
Foreign porn with subtitles is a little disappointing.
In Denver there are more bars per capita than any other city also the healthiest city. That means lots of drunk girls and no fatties.
I just got a whiff of tequila through the air conditioner.
once you started introducing yourself as "running-bear" i knew you were beyond fucked up
making an indian outfit so we can be pochohantas and john smith and fuck in the canoe on the night float
just letting you know that jen either: wasn't feeling well and ate grass to make herself throw up or threw up because she's stupid and ate grass
It was an 11am booty call. We were both out of our element.
Jasmine is diving into bushes again.
You're cock blocking me from my own boyfriend. What kind of shit is that?
I mean with a sentence like that I knew I would be cumming
The bartender has no bra and is giving out free shots. Call mom I'm getting married.
I'm disease and pregnancy free. This is an Easter for the books!
I just need some breakup sex yanno like filthy wish fulfilling breakup sex to make me forget what I never had
I woke up missing my shoes and my left eyebrow. MY. EYEBROW.
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