Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
I love sluts.
I end my prayers with that every single night.
So apparently when he was telling people he was in Alaska for 6 months he was actually in jail
We've done the math and the dogs tails are wagging at a rate of 3000 wags per hour. Stoned.
hiding in a bush to avoid a seven dollar cab ride. cabby got out a flashlight and looked for us for like an hour. help.
I am too young to be this hungover
Is this your way of saying you want a sober 19th?
You know our reunion in two weeks shall be a drunken bikini clad magical adventure right
We were high as balls fucking in the back seat when we saw the blue lights. He's like, "I got this" and walked over butt ass naked and goes, "Sorry dude, we're just banging" and the cop apologized for disturbing us and drove off.
I'm dressed as a caveman and drunk so that's not really an option
I did however clean up the cupcakes and vomit so I'm not that bad of a roommate
I can recall having this conversation with a three year old, but go on
We're at the liquor store. Then going to the hospital
So what other shows do you masturbate to? Or is it just friends
You handed me an unpeeled grapefruit off the frat basement floor and then took a bite out of it.
And for some reason every time I get drunk I just want to tell you that I have a mini secret personal fan club of your dick
Randomize
