...So a 6 ft tall drag queen in heels I would kill for just told me I have a dunkable ass. I'm confused...but I'll take any compliment I can.
i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
I'm just gonna be the bigger person here and say I want you inside me
He asked me if we could throw a lingerie party together so I guess he's single again
I can't tell if I'm hungover or if my cat just knocked the lamp on my face
I came in and I guess my parents didn't hear me. My dad just said "Don't be lazy, RIDE IT." to my mom. Never coming home again.
Definitely! I will do that this week. Right now, watching drag queens play with my dad's beard.
I think I just did my first walk of shame. He sent me home with a watermelon from his farm. Southern one night stands.
but seriously, if you see a redhead running down the street tonight in a carrot costume, call 911. He's tripping hard.
The name of the man in your bed is not Ryan. I can't remember what his name is but that is wrong
my liver is dry heaving
Its really awkward pooping while on videochat. Even if you turn the video off.
When campus security rolled up he stole their car and drove it like 100 feet. Then he walked up and gave back the keys because it was a hyundai.
u better not lose ur virginity to a sugar daddy who doesn’t post a pic of himself to tinder
You know those times when you're sitting down for a while and r like damn I'm sober but then stand up and r like WOAH HOLD UP.
Randomize
