I can't remember if we talked about feelings. Fuck you Miller High Life.
I hate this i feel like im wasting my youth here. I should be off hooking up with boys around the world and having awkward next morning convos in different languages!!
wanna get hammered and throw tomatoes at the people standing in line for the midnight showing of harry potter and yell whichcraft is evil
I SWALLOWED her nuva ring. Please tell me how your night could have been worse.
this is the second time in my life i thought i might need to go to rehab. im including all the mornings that i wake up in dewey beach as "the first time"
hold on, were in the kitchen painting a yellow brick road to my vagina on my leg with black light paint.
Facebook stalking ex-girlfriends who went to rehab. This is my life.
The fact that there are multiple ex-girlfriends who have been to rehab concerns me
I asked her politely not to touch my dick
Yea we had fun. Lost my wallet some girl has it. Sarah fell asleep in a cab and ended up at some wawa. It was cray. She's home now
I like to feed my guinea pigs before I get stoned. In case they get contact high and get the munchies. It's only polite.
I just sneezed and margarita mix and ash came out of my nose. I love jersey
I just lectured my ex boyfriend on how to eat a girl out what has my life come to
All I need to do is acquire a Shrek costume.
Please don't traumatize your girlfriend too terribly. Have fun.
She used a candle as a shot glass.. A FUCKING CANDLE BRO!!
Is it sad that my idea of a quality foursome would involve one person eating me out while the other two rub my feet?
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