try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
Ross. Joey. Chandler. Who would you do?
maybe you should start leaving anonymous bottles of booze on his doorstep with love notes attatched. that always gets me.
just fit an iguana in a condom...have pics
They just yellow carded someone for spilling a drink because it was a party foul. Love germans.
Facebook stalking a girl from Germany is harder then you think.you have to copy and paste all this shit into freetranslations.com then try and piece together an awkward sentence. If only I could put this energy into something productive.
She was knocking on the tree demanding to be let in
I'm not proud of how I threatened that 8 year old during drunken laser tag
I know. I know. The man who pulled me from my mother's womb was the same man who had his fingers in my vagina today. My life is a joke. I don't know how to feel about this.
A BJ like that needs to be recommended.
Someone just knocked jenga into a plate of cake. I'm licking off each piece one by one.
Just went grocery shopping with a vibrator in my purse and didn't even realize it. This is what Saturdays are made for.
He stopped mid thrust ... To check snap chat .. From his roomie
I'm naked and there are two trees and a yield sign
Be right there
I honestly think sometimes all you need is a $2 alcoholic punch poured from a jug into a big glass to feel better. I guess abblebees is my new problematic fav
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