At an apparent methhead hillbilly bar and was smiling for a pic when one toothless wonder screamed "look at all them teeth"!
the #6 from wendy's when stoned is definitely better than sex. i dont care what anyone says.
who knew that a girl that let me piss on her within 20 minutes of meeting her would get upset i couldn't remember her name.
...that's why he's not doing anything with his life except breeding geckos
i slept with him so i could steal the screens out of his sink faucets for my bowl when he went to sleep. not because he's funny.
plus shes a stripper, ive been with strippers, if you fuck this up your penis will never forgive you
Hne relally is a cite oerfect gome. Nes awddddddddooooome.
We found her on a strangers doorstep chanting "I know someone will let me in" it took 2 of us to drag her to the car.
SIMBAAAA REMEBER WHO YOU ARE
That would be a mascot riding an ATV at a semi-professional hockey game, if that doesn't sum up how I've been I don't know what could
You know your horny when you have a sex dream about Ace Ventura, if your wondering he's awful
I laid naked in his bed as he brought me an ice cream sandwich so I would say everything worked out great
Going overboard is basically 75% of my personality
I'm a gorgeous hot mess
before i went to bed i wrote myself a note that says 'i feel all swirly'
I need to find a divorced guy with a boat and let my tits do the talking
Randomize
