U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
I envy your ability to put any word in front o the word beer and make drinking before 5 sound like a socially sanctioned event.
He is in the front yard trying to catch birds out of the air with a fishing net.
wanna get hammered and throw tomatoes at the people standing in line for the midnight showing of harry potter and yell whichcraft is evil
you blew your rape whistle in his face every time he got near a girl till he left the party...
i dont care how hungover you are, go back to the frat house and get him. HE IS 11.
I just tripped out to the Angel of Music from Phantom of the Opera in my car. Wayyyy to high for shuffle right now.
at first i was on the bathroom floor cuz i was hungover. now im just here because it is cool
3-9 out of 10... Depends on the situation. Taco Bell is more of an idea than a restaurant.
How stoned are you?
I woke up to my roommate checking my pulse
The thought "Ummm which pants am I wearing? ...I *am* wearing pants, right?" just ran through my head. I'm done. So done.
I'm gonna guess ur still high cus last night at like 3am my pillows were morphing into cats and I kept trying to pet them
I never said it was inaccurate, I said I hate you.
Gonna be late for work. Sex comes first. Priorities.
I really prefer to do my walks of shame in the summer
Randomize
