i feel like the song jizz in my pants was made for him.
she makes me feel like im THAT guy in the taylor swift song
remind me to tell you what i found stuck to me this morning
I submitted an essay to my history teacher comparing changes in the middle ages to the song changes by David Bowie. I can't wait to see my grade on that.
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
I'm not sure what happened last night, but my turtle seems afraid of me.
There are walks of shame and then there are walks of what the hell is wrong with you.
I have to have sex with him again. I feel like I need to train him so no other girl experiences that bad of sex.
we got hammered off table wine and i ended up biting my acrylic nail off so i could finger his butt.. ill never look at valentines day the same
No, no, we have to calibrate. What is the maximum amount of trouble we can get into without going to jail?
PUT YOUR FRESHLY SHAVED MEXICAN POON ON THAT BEARD. NOW.
He came so hard that he yelled what sounded like a spell from Harry Potter.
Just checked in with my friend who walked in on us. He thinks you two had a spiritual connection and he's bugging out
He was also rolling face on molly so his perception of divinity might be slightly off
i warned you not to do dabs 20 minutes before graduation. You never listen
I am that special "drink water and be grateful I'm alive" kind of hungover
Randomize
